These past few days I've had a lot of personal things come up and I can definitely say that stress has weighed down heavily on how I am handling myself. Even though I have not changed my eating habits in the last few days I feel like I am somehow gaining weight based off of the stress I am enduring! SOO FRUSTRATING.
Zumba tonight made me feel so good about myself, like really good! I love the way that working out makes me feel about myself, and the day after- Whew! I love that feeling of hurt in my legs and arms because I know that something is working and especially in my legs. I try to take the stairs at work, and avoid elevators as much as I possibly can and every step I can feel the ache through my body but to me it feels like heaven. It's just another reminder of how great I am doing, and the reasons that I am doing this again.
Kristen is joining the Fitbit team! This makes me really happy because we can cheer and taunt each other and really motivate us to do better. I am extremely proud of her this week because she is down 7 pounds! Woohoo you go girl! She is going to show me how to do the hustle, and we are going to use it as a little warm up and work our way up each night.
Tonight Kristen and I worked out for about two hours but it didn't really even seem like that. We were both able to accomplish 10 Push Ups, 10 Sit-ups, and some other miscellaneous stretches before we got into our Zumba routines. The start of Zumba was a little different, and we did some newer upbeat songs so of course our legs were killing us especially with Dance Fitness with Jessica and the Dark Horse song- Let me tell you- YOUR LEGS will cry after this haha. I might not be able to get all of the moves exactly like these ladies and gentleman but at least I am out there and I am trying to do them. For instance- I may not be able to complete a high kick yet, but I'm for sure going to at least do what I can and attempt a low kick!
Frankly, I weighed myself after three meals and drinking a lot of water, so I am not sure if I am way up in weight or if I had another setback.
Today's Weight: 275.6 :-(
This number makes me very sad, I am working very hard to better myself and get to a comfortable weight not only for health reasons but for myself overall. I definetly want to avoid the surgery but when I see this number again after everything I've done to make it better I do tear up a bit.
Hopefully this next week I will do much better! I am still waiting on my items from ItWorks, so I shall keep you updated once I start using them and their affects and effects :-)
Goodnight World
Sunday, March 8, 2015
Friday, March 6, 2015
The struggle of being Indoors and bad weather
Alright, well I don't know about you but I am sooo ready for summer and good weather- At this point, I would even take spring and 50's :-).
During the summer months my Brother and Sister-in-Law really pushed me to be going out and doing what I could to better myself and I really wish I could get outside now and do that! We had a great system of walking almost every night outside and around the block basically but we added to it so it was approximately 3.5 miles to walk. If you think that is an easy task at first, let me tell you- When I started I could barely make it around a single city block! I was exhausted and had trouble breathing and definitely wanted to quit. You wanna know what happened? My brother let me quit that day. However, the very next day he pushed me to do an extra two block around before I quit that time. Again, he allowed it. Little by little I did a little bit more before I had to quit and stop due to breathing, or exhaustion. By the end of the summer I could easily walk the entire thing and had no issues breathing, wasn't exhausted and felt great about myself. I can remember that first day that I made it a whole city block and I was proud that I got out and did it, when I finally walked through the door I felt like my body was rubber and just fell into my bed and said I'll never do that again.
I guess the moral of that little adventure down memory lane is 1. I am so glad that I have someone who supports me the way my brother and family does. 2. I am very glad that I never gave up 3. Most of all, I am glad that I pushed forward and kept at it, even though I wasn't able to jump at it right away and do the entire thing, I slowly buy surely worked my way up to it. Hopefully the same thing is going to happen with my weight as I just keep hacking at it and each morning when I get on that scale I say to myself, It's okay if I moved up just a little bit because this is a struggle and that just means today I will have to work a little bit harder so I can see the numbers that I want to see.
Now, Back to the bad weather and working indoors- I feel contained in a little box during this weather and can't wait to feel free and outside again! The other night I did Zumba, at home in my own little area. I was ducking the entire time because I though I was going to knock things over or hit something when I was following along with the video- However, I found some amazing starter videos and I was able to follow both and I felt great afterwards. It makes me consider joining a gym that offers these types of classes and try to find people out there just like me who are struggling with their weight and doing everything in order to fix it themselves... I guess I'm still scared of the little girl who always teased me about my rolls and that there are still people out there who feel the same way.
The struggle is not just physical, its also mental. One day, hopefully soon I will have the courage.
Today's weight: 269.2
I feel good about today's number. Is it where I want to be? Heck No. However it is another step in the right direction and out of the horrible 70's.
During the summer months my Brother and Sister-in-Law really pushed me to be going out and doing what I could to better myself and I really wish I could get outside now and do that! We had a great system of walking almost every night outside and around the block basically but we added to it so it was approximately 3.5 miles to walk. If you think that is an easy task at first, let me tell you- When I started I could barely make it around a single city block! I was exhausted and had trouble breathing and definitely wanted to quit. You wanna know what happened? My brother let me quit that day. However, the very next day he pushed me to do an extra two block around before I quit that time. Again, he allowed it. Little by little I did a little bit more before I had to quit and stop due to breathing, or exhaustion. By the end of the summer I could easily walk the entire thing and had no issues breathing, wasn't exhausted and felt great about myself. I can remember that first day that I made it a whole city block and I was proud that I got out and did it, when I finally walked through the door I felt like my body was rubber and just fell into my bed and said I'll never do that again.
I guess the moral of that little adventure down memory lane is 1. I am so glad that I have someone who supports me the way my brother and family does. 2. I am very glad that I never gave up 3. Most of all, I am glad that I pushed forward and kept at it, even though I wasn't able to jump at it right away and do the entire thing, I slowly buy surely worked my way up to it. Hopefully the same thing is going to happen with my weight as I just keep hacking at it and each morning when I get on that scale I say to myself, It's okay if I moved up just a little bit because this is a struggle and that just means today I will have to work a little bit harder so I can see the numbers that I want to see.
Now, Back to the bad weather and working indoors- I feel contained in a little box during this weather and can't wait to feel free and outside again! The other night I did Zumba, at home in my own little area. I was ducking the entire time because I though I was going to knock things over or hit something when I was following along with the video- However, I found some amazing starter videos and I was able to follow both and I felt great afterwards. It makes me consider joining a gym that offers these types of classes and try to find people out there just like me who are struggling with their weight and doing everything in order to fix it themselves... I guess I'm still scared of the little girl who always teased me about my rolls and that there are still people out there who feel the same way.
The struggle is not just physical, its also mental. One day, hopefully soon I will have the courage.
Today's weight: 269.2
I feel good about today's number. Is it where I want to be? Heck No. However it is another step in the right direction and out of the horrible 70's.
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
Celebrations and Restaurants
So of course, we all have family members or friends that have Birthday's or going away parties, or a need for a celebration for any other sort of reason. How does it make you feel though? When you enter that restaurant or the area that everyone else is in do you immediately feel self-conscious about how you look, what you represent and even what you think you should or shouldn't order? I feel these ways constantly.
Tonight, we are celebrating my Brother's Birthday at Texas Roadhouse ( A steakhouse of sorts) and of course you have to order food, and they are not really known for their salads now are they? Of course not. I have to deal with friends and other family members who will order their food, ask me what I am ordering and I have to have that answer. Should I splurge and order something delicious? Should I order a small salad and make due so that I am hungry later? Or should I just order what I want to eat and have people look at me as if I just ordered the whole menu, and have to be asked many questions by the waitress who of course is a skinny girl who looks at me with those OMG does she really need to order that meal eyes. It's not like I want to order the whole menu, just some chicken and gravy from a steak house from crying out loud!
It's like when someone brings in donuts, and doesn't ask if you want one until everyone else takes one first because they are afraid you'll eat the majority and not leave some for the rest of the people around. It gets frustrating after a while because, even though I am considered obese I honestly don't eat all the donuts that get brought in, heck its a rare occasion when I even take one because I am afraid of what people will think of me as soon as I do take one.
Tonight I start my first Zumba session. Of course, I am going to do it alone in my basement because I don't have anyone to work out with, and I have so many of my own issues to go someplace even just to pay $5 to work out with a group of people. Eventually I will get there, don't you worry but as far as today I am going to do what I can and make it count. I even went ahead and looked at Purchasing an elliptical machine earlier today and found a pretty decent one for only $129 which almost beats the gym price---If I can watch TV while I am pushing myself some people think that it would help motivate me to keep working out and it wouldn't be a bored situation. First, I have to get the approval for where I would want to store it. :-)
Wanna challenge me on your Fitbit? I'd love to have more people push me to do better.
It's an ounce at a time: Today's Weight: 270.5
It doesn't matter if I didn't lose a pound, because Every Ounce Counts.
Tonight, we are celebrating my Brother's Birthday at Texas Roadhouse ( A steakhouse of sorts) and of course you have to order food, and they are not really known for their salads now are they? Of course not. I have to deal with friends and other family members who will order their food, ask me what I am ordering and I have to have that answer. Should I splurge and order something delicious? Should I order a small salad and make due so that I am hungry later? Or should I just order what I want to eat and have people look at me as if I just ordered the whole menu, and have to be asked many questions by the waitress who of course is a skinny girl who looks at me with those OMG does she really need to order that meal eyes. It's not like I want to order the whole menu, just some chicken and gravy from a steak house from crying out loud!
It's like when someone brings in donuts, and doesn't ask if you want one until everyone else takes one first because they are afraid you'll eat the majority and not leave some for the rest of the people around. It gets frustrating after a while because, even though I am considered obese I honestly don't eat all the donuts that get brought in, heck its a rare occasion when I even take one because I am afraid of what people will think of me as soon as I do take one.
Tonight I start my first Zumba session. Of course, I am going to do it alone in my basement because I don't have anyone to work out with, and I have so many of my own issues to go someplace even just to pay $5 to work out with a group of people. Eventually I will get there, don't you worry but as far as today I am going to do what I can and make it count. I even went ahead and looked at Purchasing an elliptical machine earlier today and found a pretty decent one for only $129 which almost beats the gym price---If I can watch TV while I am pushing myself some people think that it would help motivate me to keep working out and it wouldn't be a bored situation. First, I have to get the approval for where I would want to store it. :-)
Wanna challenge me on your Fitbit? I'd love to have more people push me to do better.
It's an ounce at a time: Today's Weight: 270.5
It doesn't matter if I didn't lose a pound, because Every Ounce Counts.
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Not really the beginning, but the beginning to an end
My name is Trisha and I am a 24 year old lady who has had to struggle with weight my entire life. People think that I choose what I look like, and that I don't care about my body but let me tell you folks- I care. From the time that I was in Elementary school there was this girl named Shelby and she was younger than me, had friends older than me and always seemed to target me, asking me how the baking was going and would always remind me that I brought some extra rolls to school that day. Well, I stopped dressing in the clothes that I liked after a while and started dressing in clothes that were baggy and would hide these "rolls" as she called them.
Fast forward.....
Have you tried everything out there? I thought I did, but now I am going to work harder to make sure that I do. I've tried dieting, changing my foods, going on a strict liquid only diet, Medical Weight Loss, Lipozene, and all of the other products out there and NOTHING has worked! It's frustrating as hell trying to make it work and try to keep small goals of just a little bit more, a pound at a time, heck, an ounce at a time!
A few months ago I had a scare and after being taken off of work for almost two months I was diagnosed with Severe Sleep Apnea and was told that the only possibility of ever getting of of the machine which allowed my continuous breathing at night was going to be weight loss. Yes, My doctor said those dreaded words that I have been trying to accomplish since I was 12 years old ( HALF OF MY LIFE) he makes it sound so easy and without even catching a breath he tells me that he thinks my only option is Bariatric Surgery.
Now, I am all for weight loss and losing weight fast but I have to think to myself---THIS IS NOT A RACE, this is a struggle. I don't want to take the what some people would consider the "easy way out" I want to take the right way out for me.
I upgraded my FitBit to the New charge HR so that I could track my own heart and pray to never have to wear those wires and heart monitors again and here I am starting fresh and wanting a clean slate to work from. I still have to go to all the appointments and of course I have two different cardiologists, a neurologist and of course my primary doctor who are all telling me what I can't do, but I have to try.
My best friend Kristen wants to lose weight and were in this together. Everyday when I feel I am about to slip, or if I have an endless craving or something come over me I instantly find myself pikcing up the phone to call, text or even facebook message her. She probably thinks at this point that she shouldn't have agreed to be my partner and coach in this struggle but I am so glad that she has. We recently tried the 30 day JJ diet where we eat once a day and drink fruit and vegetable smoothies the rest, it was working for the first week until our bodies basically put a stop to that for lack of calories.
My Next Step....
I went back to my doctor and finally made him really listen to me, even though he thinks that I should commit to the bariatric surgery and start right away we made an agreement. He has to give me 6 months on my own first. If after 6 months I can't lose at least 50 pounds then and only then will I actually consider the surgery. I did what I had to do and asked him for help. He suggested that I try a new product and see if it helps me. It is in a product line called ItWorks ( I guess we shall see if that name fits). My new friends are called Fat Fighters and ThermoFit, I placed my order today at the recommendation of my doctor who still thinks I'm being ridiculous by attempting this on my own.
So folk, you see my story and this is where it starts. I weighed myself in today at 271 pounds.
My Goals:
1. Avoid Bariatric Surgery at all Costs
2. Be able to complete 15 sit-ups by the end of March
3. Be able to Run by June 1
4. Lose 50 pounds in 6 months
My Doctors Goals:
1. Convince me Bariatric Surgery is the only choice left
2. Have my weight goal at 150 Pounds this time next year
Even though his goals sound great, I still think mine sound better.
Til next time!
Fast forward.....
Have you tried everything out there? I thought I did, but now I am going to work harder to make sure that I do. I've tried dieting, changing my foods, going on a strict liquid only diet, Medical Weight Loss, Lipozene, and all of the other products out there and NOTHING has worked! It's frustrating as hell trying to make it work and try to keep small goals of just a little bit more, a pound at a time, heck, an ounce at a time!
A few months ago I had a scare and after being taken off of work for almost two months I was diagnosed with Severe Sleep Apnea and was told that the only possibility of ever getting of of the machine which allowed my continuous breathing at night was going to be weight loss. Yes, My doctor said those dreaded words that I have been trying to accomplish since I was 12 years old ( HALF OF MY LIFE) he makes it sound so easy and without even catching a breath he tells me that he thinks my only option is Bariatric Surgery.
Now, I am all for weight loss and losing weight fast but I have to think to myself---THIS IS NOT A RACE, this is a struggle. I don't want to take the what some people would consider the "easy way out" I want to take the right way out for me.
I upgraded my FitBit to the New charge HR so that I could track my own heart and pray to never have to wear those wires and heart monitors again and here I am starting fresh and wanting a clean slate to work from. I still have to go to all the appointments and of course I have two different cardiologists, a neurologist and of course my primary doctor who are all telling me what I can't do, but I have to try.
My best friend Kristen wants to lose weight and were in this together. Everyday when I feel I am about to slip, or if I have an endless craving or something come over me I instantly find myself pikcing up the phone to call, text or even facebook message her. She probably thinks at this point that she shouldn't have agreed to be my partner and coach in this struggle but I am so glad that she has. We recently tried the 30 day JJ diet where we eat once a day and drink fruit and vegetable smoothies the rest, it was working for the first week until our bodies basically put a stop to that for lack of calories.
My Next Step....
I went back to my doctor and finally made him really listen to me, even though he thinks that I should commit to the bariatric surgery and start right away we made an agreement. He has to give me 6 months on my own first. If after 6 months I can't lose at least 50 pounds then and only then will I actually consider the surgery. I did what I had to do and asked him for help. He suggested that I try a new product and see if it helps me. It is in a product line called ItWorks ( I guess we shall see if that name fits). My new friends are called Fat Fighters and ThermoFit, I placed my order today at the recommendation of my doctor who still thinks I'm being ridiculous by attempting this on my own.
So folk, you see my story and this is where it starts. I weighed myself in today at 271 pounds.
My Goals:
1. Avoid Bariatric Surgery at all Costs
2. Be able to complete 15 sit-ups by the end of March
3. Be able to Run by June 1
4. Lose 50 pounds in 6 months
My Doctors Goals:
1. Convince me Bariatric Surgery is the only choice left
2. Have my weight goal at 150 Pounds this time next year
Even though his goals sound great, I still think mine sound better.
Til next time!
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